All that we fall for

"With some break-ups, all you can think about afterwards is how badly it ended and how much the other person hurt you. With others, you become sentimental for the good times and lose track of what went wrong."
I think it should be mandatory for every person to read Boy Meets Boy. Once I return it to the library, go borrow it! :)

Does it mean anything to you that I crawled into my bed last night and your face was the first thing that popped into my thoughts? Your lovely green eyes, almost translucently so when the sun hits them directly, just right. Reliving the night that we reconnected with a spontaneous call and you picking me up in your classy car, Saosin blasting and reminding me of another once upon a time. Our predictable babble. Me making fun of you, with you just making fun of me in return. None of it meaning anything, but meaning everything at the same time. Fighting over where to eat for almost an hour until finally coming to an agreement. Running into a friend of yours, only for me to feel like this was a bad idea when you didn't introduce me and your friend didn't care enough to ask and I was too busy contemplating to offer myself. What would you introduce me as, anyway? Not your girlfriend, no. A friend? No, we aren't really that either. Being shaken from my reverie as you pull me to my favorite table, which happens to be yours too. It reminds me of yet another once upon a time, but I brush this off as I did the first one. It's not about them anymore, but I still can't decide whether it's about you yet, either. Talking and laughing and telling stories. Feeling your fingers brush my cheek as you tuck a hair behind my ear while you look right into my eyes with a look I can't decipher. So cliche yet so wonderful and surprising that I don't know what to say so I don't say anything. This embarrasses you so we start to eat the food I paid for and you feel guilty about. We leave and I am aching and yearning for an adventure but we don't know what to do in a town where we've already done everything there is to do. So we decide to get ice cream but you don't get anything which makes me feel like a pig, but as if you can read my mind, you squeeze my sides as we walk randomly through a grocery store, exclaiming that I have absolutely no body fat so I should quit worrying, because you can see it all over my face. I tell you that you can read my mind and you just briefly smile and turn your head to face front again. The night is almost over and we get into an argument, predictably, since when have we not? You drop me off without saying goodbye and I don't try to say anything either... I walk inside and refuse the urge to wave. You're the only guy who has ever waited to leave until I got into the door. I appreciate this. I sit on my couch, alone, all alone in my house and I wait for a call from you that I know won't come, but I hope for anyway. You're too stubborn though, and I guess I am too.

I still haven't gotten that call...